I’m angry

Salam to all , well I know this is my second post on this blog yet I still want to write it .

I’m angry , Why ?

Tell me why do you guys need to have a relationship that is not even halal in syariah ? Why ? Just because you guys lonely ? Jealous seeing others happy with someone special with their side ? ME TOO ! I’M JEALOUS WITH THAT KIND OF THINGS TOO , but you guys took a wrong step my dear . A very huge wrong step .

Why , you guys asked ?

Please rethink , do love your mother , father , your siblings enough til you can give your love to others just like that ? Do you ?

Do you , love , worships every single thing that the Lord tells you to do ? Do you ?

Do you ever love yourself and respect yourself that you gave your heart , your whole feelings and trust to the other person without any doubt ?

Do you ever think why is it so hard to maintain your relationship with you so called the only loved one ?

Do you  ever feel guilty to other that tries to teach you what’s right and wrong , that loved you without any doubt , that raise you hardly by seeing you sad when your sweet heart broke your small heart ? DO YOU ?

Don’t tell me the answers . because I don’t give a damn thinking ’bout it . I really don’t

You guys might say , I’ve  never been in your shoes , I’m lame , I see the world with no love , etc. etc . . but you guys never know that I do fall in love . I’ve been there , it’s just I didn’t do it . Not that I scared or having low self esteem . Not that I hate doing it . It is called self control .

Have you ever thought that ;

– do I really like him/her

– do I really meant for him/her

– Am I ready for that

– Am I good enough for him/her

do you ?

I love someone that is not mine , maybe never be mine or someday he will be mine . I try to be as good as he is , so that one day , I am satisfy whether he choose me or others . It is because I see love differently from others . I want to have a happy days with him , yet , I don’t love my all enough , no . I can never share it with him because I am responsible with others . I try to be selfless , I try to be more merciful , I try to be grateful to Allah for what he has gave me through all my years living .

Why can’t you see that ? why you guys try to defy what is right and what is wrong ?

maybe I’m a bit extreme . but watch this . maybe it will make you see of what you can’t see

hear , read and heed

I’m not perfect , I maybe harsh , I maybe weak . I’m human that can never fight that I do love a man . It is just not the right time to be with him yet . I need to be better , for my future love ones  .

 

Sincerely

Bel 

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